Escalation

Unlike a lot of other things, the Fears won’t just go away if you ignore them. I knew this, and it was only a matter of time before I started getting visits. I was expecting the usual thing. Stalking, slowly increasing paranoia, the works. I suppose I should have known that They are not so predictable. They’ve pretty much done everything to prove that, but I seem to be a slow learner. Sometimes I forget that I’m just another sheep to be slaughtered. They don’t care about playing if They want you dead.

I was sitting in my room, when it got even colder. I anticipated what was going to happen next, so I grabbed my bag, baseball bat in hand. I watched as frost slowly crept over my windows, obscuring the outside world. My fish tank froze solid (poor Archimedes, you were an awesome goldfish). 

Incident Three

The voices remained, and I was still cold. It never escalated beyond the first level of Fear hauntings. It seemed more like they were warning me not to get involved rather than actually messing with me. Apparently they weren’t that interested in me at first. I learned to ignore them, keep trying to move on. As I said when I started this, I knew what I was getting into, what I was risking. I wasn’t about to give everything up at the first signs of trouble.

The weird part was when it continued after I said I would stop. I couldn’t fathom why they wouldn’t just do me in at that point if they weren’t actually telling me to stop.

Incident Two

I remained cold, but nothing else happened for a while. However, I lied when I said I didn’t think I was infected by the Choir. The people around me started accusing me of causing Nessa and Tallie’s death. They told me I could have saved them. I could have saved Nessa if I had told her what was happening to her. I could have saved Tallie if I had just paid closer attention. I knew the signs of a Choir infection, why didn’t I see them? They said that I wouldn’t have forgotten Niel and Marianne if I had been stronger.

I learned to ignore the voices. It was hard, but I’ve always believed that you can get used to something if you’re subjected to it constantly. It got easier when I finally admitted they were just articulating the thoughts in the back of my own mind.

Chapter 3: the Silent Observer

I’m sorry, guys. I told you this wasn’t my story to tell, but at this point mine is a story that needs to be told. I didn’t want this to be about me. This was supposed to be about everyone else. Now I’ve got no choice. It’s time to tell my own story.

It started about a month ago, right after I moved in with Tallie. I’ve always been a pretty cold-blooded person (as in, I’m cold all the time, not that I’m emotionless), so I always carry a space heater whenever I stay somewhere new. But my space heater seemed to be crapping out, I had it set to the highest temperature, but it still seemed freezing in my room. Then Tallie came in, and mentioned that it “was a friggin’ sauna” in my there.

This was the beginning.

The End

I’m done with this. I’m tired of seeing people die. I’m tired of being wrong and not being able to do anything about it. I’m tired.

I’m done. do you hear me?

I’m going to counseling because of Tallie. I’m back with my parents. I don’t know if I’ll go back to school. If I do, I’ll probably transfer somewhere new. I’m leaving, see?

But this story is over.

Goodbye. Will you leave me alone now?

Failure

I've done it again. I've failed another person. And this time it was my one and only friend. Tallie's dead. Even with all the precautions the hospital took, she managed to kill herself. I don't know how she got a hold of the supplies to do it with, but somehow she managed to do it.

There was probably some Fear activity in that. At least, that's what I'd like to think. Tallie couldn't have been that desperate. I refuse to believe it.

I don't think I can do this any more.

Message From Tallie

Tallie finally contacted me. I'm both relieved and worried at the same time. At least I know where she is. Earlier today she called me and told me that she'd checked herself in to a mental hospital. This is basically what she said:

"Hey, [Silent], I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was leaving. I'm sorry for everything.You’ve been a really good friend to me, and I know you wanted to help me. I guess you probably could have if I’d given you the chance. This has been going on for a while. I could see that you needed a friend, and I’m sorry that friend was me. You just seemed so lonely, and I couldn't help myself. This was inevitable, really. I won’t be here much longer. Sorry.  Just… be quiet... SHUT UP FOR A MOMENT WILL YOU? They won’t go away, [Silent]. They never will. I don't really have much of a choice anymore. Don’t forget that you’re a good person. Even if you don’t think so."

She didn't give me a chance to say anything. She just gave her speech and then hung up. I contacted the hospital right after she ended the call and made sure they understood her suicidal tendencies. They won't let me visit right now, because they're still doing some evaluations on her, but I'm hoping I'll be able to talk to her again soon.

Homeless

I had to leave the apartment. The mold was starting to spread, so I packed some clothes for both me and Tallie. I don't have a car, but I have a little money, so I'm staying at a cheap hotel sort of nearby. I've been looking through the city nonstop, but I still haven't found any trace of Tallie.

I've sent messages to her email account, facebook, cell phone, everything I could think of. She hasn't replied.

How can I be so blind?

Why can I never see these things coming? I've been looking so hard for Fear activity. I've been looking everywhere.

Maybe that's why I can't see what is right in front of me.

I went through Tallie's room more thoroughly yesterday. I was looking for some sort of clue pertaining to where she is. While I was doing so, I found mold. Everywhere. It was gray and fuzzy and all over the floors and the air vent. Either that stuff spreads extremely quickly or it has been there for a very long time.

Tallie's room is the only one in the apartment that is infected with it. I really need to find her. I've been trying to think of places she might be. I'm going to start checking them out tonight.

Why didn't she tell me about this?

…Lost…

Tallie is gone. After she didn’t come out of her room for a few days I was worried, so I picked the lock and went in. It was empty. Her stuff was strewn across the floor. The window was open. There was no note.

What is happening?

What do I do?